Friday night was Guy Night for the youth at my church. There has been much speculation as to what has gone on at Guy Night, but all the details cannot be revealed. Some of our activities included: egghead jousting( each guy puts a leg from pantyhose on their head, we place an egg under the pantyhose just above the forehead, give each participant a pool noodle and they have to try and break the other’s egg) We are Proud to announce that after five rounds Matthew is the new victor! Another event was bananna chug, which involves eating a bannana and chugging a can of 7up and see who can hold it down the longest.(Not so fun for the contestants but us spectators got a lot of enjoyment watching everybody almost puke!)We are proud to announce that Brandon succesfully kept his down while Blake’s fate was not so great! We also made marshmallow shooters and then had a free-for-all war shooting marshmallows at each other. I am happy to report that my eye is still intact after catching one from point-blank range from Matthew! There was also the amazing flying potatoes and the not so amazing ones as well. I made a spudzooka, tatergun, potato cannon, whatever you want to call it. It’s a little device that will fire potatoes a good 100 to 200 yards in the air or at a target depending on the amount of propellant you use. (hairspray, deoderant, propane) We also watched some ultimate fighting, japanese game shows, played some video games and all in all just hung out celebrating the fact we ARE guys.
I have been asked several times why Guy Night? Why are you excluding the girls? To which I will explain myself here:
Guys are becoming extinct. Especially in the church. We’re told we can’t act too masculine or do certain things because it’s not socially/culturally acceptable to act this way. We’re told we have to be sensitive, nurturing and tolerant of other people’s feelings. We are told that the very things that make us guys needs to be harnessed and controlled so that we will fit into this culture our society has formed.
I will agree that there is a time and a place for being repectful and sensitive to other’s feelings, but you can do that without becoming effeminate. The trick is balancing Guy behavior while still being respectful. I mean we all should know that it’s not acceptable to burp or fart while Ladies are present. We know that watching other guys getting hit in the crotch is funny as long as it’s not you, but in the prescence of ladies and maybe your parents this isn’t the best type of behavior to express. We know that launching a potato 100 yards, hitting a metal door and putting a dent in it is cool, but we don’t do it every day because of the cost. Having a marshmallow war and getting shot in the face or ear with marshmallows may seem dangerous, but c’mon they’re flippen marshmallows! We think watching guys puke is funny, and even funnier when they have pantyhose on their head and you purposely crush the egg on the head before the opponent gets a chance to do it is pretty darn hilarious as well. But the fact is guys need an opportunity every once in a while to be guys. Do you remeber the movie Fight Club? The whole purpose for starting that club was to express their masculinity. The movie took it a little far but they’re something to be said for celebrating masculintiy.
If nothing else, we made memories. We have a commroderie now between us guys that got together Friday night that will last for a long time if not for a lifetime. Guy night also provided an opportunity for those who only have moms at home to see the side of masculinity that they might never get to see.
The key word to guy night is balance. Not to worry parents, I discussed this with them just before shooting them with marshmallows.